Name: Sam G.

Message: How do I know if I am actually in love or if I am just really horny?

Dear Sam,

I wish I could give you a definitive answer but, I absolutely cannot. What I CAN do is describe to you the feelings I get when in love, or otherwise. Hopefully you’ll be able to discern a little more easily?

Theresa, in love: I want to be with that person all of the time. I want to do everything with them. I could easily just spend time laying on the couch, talking, and staring at them (obviously they’d be looking back at me. I try not to be a creep). When I kiss them I get a feeling in my stomach, and it is NOT a horny feeling (though that’s there too), but a feeling of contentment, like everything is exactly how it should be, and this is the person I’m meant to be kissing. I want to know everything about them. How their brain works, what makes them sad, what makes them angry, what they dream about. I accept all parts of them, flaws and weaknesses included. I can picture my life with them; vacations, a home, good times, bad times. I want to introduce them to my friends. I think about them daily. Etc. etc. etc.

Theresa, not in love: Those other feelings are really just a means to an end, aren’t they? It’s fun and exciting, but at the end of the day, do you want to get to know this person, inside and out? (Get your mind out of the gutter, Sam, you know what I mean!) I’m not going to give too much detail here, because there ARE some things I don’t need to share with the internet. But suffice to say, I am able to tell the difference between the feelings in my stomach in both situations. I hope you can too! -T

REWIND to this...

The Gaslight Anthem- Desire: Okay this song doesn’t answer your question. But it does kinda describe some of the feels I mentioned above. And it’s also PERFECT for the summer. I’ve been going through some rough times recently, and this band really helps me get through the worst of it. Check out this song and see if you can relate. It makes me feel all sorts of good things when I hear it, but not really the “in love” sort of good things, if you catch my drift. Let me know how it works out for you, my fingers are crossed for “in love!” 

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