Name: Kyle D
Message: How do I get this girl from work to go out on a date with me? Also what do I do on a date? Also What if we go out and it suckssss and then I have to see her at work the next day.
This is one of my favorite questions so far. Before I give you advice on how to ask, what to do, etc., I am going to give you advice based on past experience:
DON’T SHIT WHERE YOU EAT!!!
Sorry, too harsh? But seriously. Getting involved with a coworker has the potential to be super destructive and messy. Been there, done that, ended up quitting my job, moving 100 miles away, and hurting a lot of people, including myself. If you value your job, your steady income, and your sanity, I highly recommend not going forward with this. Unless you’re really young and this isn’t your career and you’re flipping burgers or folding t-shirts. In that case, you do you!
Okay, so you’re still into it? Still want to take this girl out?
First, you should probably just ask her! Maybe you’re worried she isn’t interested, but rally, what’s the absolute worst outcome? I’ll tell you. She could say no. But, if she’s a decent person, which I’m sure she is, she will not make it awkward for you. Also, you should probably make it clear you want it to be a date. I’m kind of naïve and a little crazy sometimes, and to be honest, I’ve been on dates I didn’t realize were dates until way later. I’m talking months later. I’ve also been on what I thought was a date, but it absolutely was not. There are still a few I’m unsure about. Also, one of my exes thought I hated him the first few times we hung out, when really I was totally smitten! I’m not trying to dissuade you at all, I’m just suggesting that you be as clear as possible. Unless you WANT to be sneaky because you think it would be easier to not come out and say it. Then be a sneak. Or grow a pair. Whichever.
Second, first dates are usually a little awkward. You want to get to know the person but you’re both nervous. I would suggest coffee or a light meal; somewhere you can people watch while also chatting. An ideal first date for me would be going for coffee or tapas. Sit outside, maybe on a patio. You can talk and make googly eyes at each other, but it’s not super romantic and there isn’t too much pressure. Stay away from candlelit dinners, spicy or smelly foods, and extreme sports. Also, please don’t get drunk. First dates are not the time to get tanked. When I get drunk I talk too much and overshare, and I also get handsy. That is so not okay for a first date.
Finally, like I said before, if it doesn’t go well, hopefully you can both just laugh it off. It’s one of those “this will be funny someday,” situations. And I promise, someday it WILL be funny.
REWIND to this...
Blink 182- First Date: How could I not? This brings me back to high school. A fun song, from a fun band. These guys had a way of really speaking to young people. Especially angry/awkward/weird young people. And it’s all so true. First dates are totally nerve wracking. So are first kisses! At 27 I can honestly say I probably have at least a couple more first kisses coming to me. And the thought of that alone makes me nervous! So ask this girl out, then when she says yes you can dance around your room listening to Blink 182 and dousing yourself in Axe body spray, or whatever dudes do before first dates.