Name: Cath L
Message: Hello Theresa! My ex and I were together for almost 2 years, all of my friends are his friends and now I feel like I can't see any of them anymore. It's been 3 months since we broke up - will I ever be able to hang out with our friends again? Plz hlp.
Dear Cath,
I have not related to a question more than I have yours. I was in an incredibly similar situation a while ago. And I’m going to be super real with you right now. You probably won’t be able to hang with those friends again. Not all of them, at least. There are always some friends you’re able to share. BUT you have to understand, things have changed. They will not go back to how they were. It’s sad, it sucks, but it’s part of life. Good will come out of this, I promise. 6 months later, my social circle has shrunk immensely, but I am surrounding by a handful of good friends that I love. Old friends who would never go anywhere and new ones who I absolutely adore.
Also, now that I’m a little older, I’m okay with my small circle. I have a few amazing close girlfriends, that make me smile every single day . A bunch of spread out awesome old friends in other states who I’m in touch with constantly. I have my cousins and my sister, who are amazing women I keep very close to me. And then I have my boyfriend, who is also my best friend, and my rock.
So, yes. It sucks that you have to lose so many friends. I’ve felt the same loss recently. But I promise, life goes on. Other people of value will enter into your life. Some of those people are probably closer than you think. And you will seriously be happy again. Probably happier than you ever were before. So buck up.
And you can be my friend if you want. Sometimes I’m kind of funny. And I cook a lot. Let’s hang! -T
REWIND to this...
Alkaline Trio - "The Poison": This song won’t really cheer you up. But it’ll help you get some anger out probably. It’s dark and morbid and I love it. Let yourself feel pissed for a while, and listen to this song. It’s my favorite “life sucks and everything is shit” song. Like I’m having an awful day at work right now and this song is running through my head while I stare at the people who are slowly destroying my soul piece by piece. And honestly? It helps.
